Ladies and gentlemen, this girl right here had me in fits of laughter with her hilarious stories and infectious giggle. Keep reading to find out all about Detroit living, her love for Gucci Mane and Big Sean and her ideas of love…
Cupid: Well hello there. They told me you didn’t wanna talk to me. Obviously they lied.
K: They didn’t want us to talk to each other, but I can be rebellious at times.
C: Nothing will keep us apart. How is your day going my sweet?
K: Great, it’s beautiful.
C: Aren’t you in Detroit? I thought it was cold there.
K: Yep, I’m in the D. It was chilly but it’s perfect now, like 60 degree weather, it definitely feels like spring *waves goodbye to the winter*, at least this week.
C: Well I was about to come and keep you warm but I guess I can take you wearing less clothes. Less clothes is always good *smiles*
What’s that?…Fuck! management just told me to stop being a perv. They’re really tryna come between us. I guess I have to start this interview…. (but I do love you).
K: You say that to everybody “Cupid you don’t love me, Cupid you don’t love me” (sorry, I just had a rat attack) ok I’m focused now.
C: Woah, did you just quote Gucci Mane?
K: That’s one of the few Gucci songs I know so it pops in my head sometimes. Don’t judge me.
C: Cute girls can get away with stuff like that, no judgement from me. But it does raise an interesting question. What is your music taste? Mostly rap, or do you venture into other genres?
(Sidenote: I shot Gucci with a Love Bullet one time, but I didn’t know he was gonna walk into an ice cream parlour).
K: I like hip-hop, jazz, soft rock, tribal music, r&b, basically whatever my ear likes… I grew up as a band dweeb so I like a lot of music… I always wondered what made him get that ice cream facial… I mean tattoo, that totally came out wrong my apologies.
C: *laughs* Nah, I think that’s what we should call it.
K: Hahaha noooooooooo!
C: Yesssssss…burr. So what instrument did you play, Miss Band Camp?
K: Clarinet, percussion, harp…
C: So you’re good with your mouth AND your hands?
Man… management don’t want me to have any fun. Alright, I’ll keep it clean.
K: Whoa!!! Hahaha, I’ll never tell.
C: Thank you, what we do behind closed doors is our business. But before we close those doors, tell me if those stories about Band Camp are true…?
K: For some folks maybe, but not for me I was INNOCENT and PURE *smiles*
C: I know… I know
K: Hahaha that face was cute.
C: I thought everything I did was cute… But enough about me, let’s talk about you some more. That’s why we’re here after all. So what do you do during the day?
K: I work during the day and I also get some studying done while I’m there, and a lot of laughing… So a whole lot of multitasking is what I do.
C: What is this occupation of yours?
K: I’m a caseworker for the state of Michigan… So basically I help families get back on their feet with medical, food benefits, cash, housing, etc
C: What a good samaritan.
K: I try, I try.
C: And you seem so sweet, you’re just the most amazing person, no wonder I love you.
K: Awwwwwww thanks, hugs and a smooch on the cheek for you, love ya too…
C: So tell me a funny story from your work. A really funny one. I want to laugh.
K: It might not be funny to you, I laugh easily let me think of something really quick… Okie doke… let’s see…
So, my last name is Wardell, pronounced the same way it’s spelled (War-Dell). This middle aged lady comes up to me and says, MS. WHOREDALE, I need to talk to you about my case, so I’m like “How are you” she’s like, “I’m fine MS. WHOREDALE” so I tell her “It’s Wardell” so she’s like “Well Whoredale fits you better” (ouch) and then says “You look a lot worse since the last time I saw you.” So after a few minutes, we finally get started with her app and of course she doesn’t get the amount she thinks she deserves, so she decides to throw her grocery bag full of papers on the floor and says “F*ck this sh*t” and walks out.
It might not be funny to you but it was funny as heck to me, but I had to hold it in lollll!
C: *laughs hysterically* I haven’t laughed that hard since 1439! Holy shit! I’m crying actual cherub tears.
K: Lmaooooo you’re making me blush.
C: I like when you blush. And now that I’m looking, you have a really unique sense of style. You gotta tell me about this color in your hair…
K: Thank you, I basically wanted to try something different. My hair was red all over before, but I let that color grow out and then I kinda started rocking my natural color and wanted some more spice in my life so I dyed it purple. Then after that I accidentally put blue in it (rushing) and I liked it, so I left it in.
C: That was a pretty nice mistake then.
K: Thank you.
C: People have got to be brave to even be able to break away from the norm. I applaud you. Me personally, I walk around with my sack out and a belt on. It seems to be working…
K: So true, it’s best to just live life to the fullest… Yeah you love to have your balls hanging… But you tone it down with the Chucks so I guess it’s cool.
C: Indeed. Tell me about Detroit living.
K: Some parts, hmph, I would call it a Loveless Society, some parts are beautiful… But I find beauty in everything, even the rough parts. I like to think of my fellow Detroiters as “diamonds in the rough” if you can make it here you can make it anywhere… But I have faith in my city. We just have to come together and work, ya dig?
C: Woah dere boi… I do it!
C: Damn straight. Moving on… What are some things that drive Kim?
K: Life, struggles, my mom; seeing her work her buns off without complaining and without help (I refuse to let her struggles go in vain), my dad overcoming his addictions, children (since they are the future) and elders (since they’ve paved the way for us)… just knowing that I deserve better motivates me to grind and actively pursue my dreams.
C: With motivation like that, you can’t lose.
K: I won’t lose and if I stumble I’m not afraid to get back up so it’s all good.
C: Right right. So… tell me about this pretty little lady on your ribs.
K: This little lady on my ribs is my mini me, she’s fly, I looooveeeee her hair, it’s free, she loves love, and she’s waiting for this love bomb to go off esp here (in the D) so we can spread more love… She’s a part of me, I just love her *giggles*
C: Nice, real nice. So it’s hard to find love in Detroit?
K: I won’t say it’s hard, I just haven’t found love, or love hasn’t found me, yet… But it’s a time for everything, so I’m patient.
C: It’s good to be patient. Your husband may be reading this interview. What are you looking for in a guy? So he can know if it’s him or not…
K: Hahaha, a hard worker, an independent thinker, someone who appreciates life, a leader, a MAN, someone who is positive, and who accepts me for me, and encourages me to grow and be the best person ever (I’ll encourage him too), and someone who I can laugh with.
C: Let me get to work then *cocks gun*
C: Well miss Kimberly, this interview was easily the highlight of my week, and I’m sure that it will be for many others. As much as I want to talk with you for hours upon hours, I think I’ll let you go, so I can go keep this bottle of Jack company. While I still have you, is there anything you want to say to your adoring fans?
K: Thanks for chatting with me, it was the highlight of my week, too… Ummm basically just spread love everyday, think positive thoughts and you will attract positive things and good feelings, pursue your dreams, and never give up… and you can always kick it with me on twitter at @kitoy0820… Peace and love.
C: Noted. Before we leave, I have to let all of you know that Kim has the most infectious giggle ever, so if you want somebody around you that makes you feel like you’re the funniest person in the world, definitely keep her beside you. She’ll bring endless smiles to your day.
K: Awwwwwww you just keep on making me blush!
C: *winks* Now let’s go discuss some more of these hilarious stories over a few drinks *holds out hand*
K: Haha are you trying to get me tipsy?
C: *hangs head*… yes.
K: At least you’re honest.
C: Come on Ms. Whoredale, management’s kicking us out. Let’s go.
*As she mentioned before you can follow Kim on Twitter @Kitoy0820. Do yourself a favor and go make that happen.*